Okay, so it's been a few days since posting. Yes, I was going to try every other day or at least MWF, but there's that job thingy and ants in the bathroom. I have a new roommate (the people who run the program I am in will not allow me to have the same roommate as before. Maybe it's because we actually got along.) who has some real mental health issues. Like many people in California who cannot afford healthcare, her doctors just keep prescribing her pills and more pills. She showed me the handbag she has to keep them in. Instead of taking care of the problem through psychotherapy, they just give her more drugs because it is cheaper. But is it better?
No one will disagree with me when I tell them I need my Prozac. Prior to taking Prozac, I was a mess. I would throw a hissy fit if anything didn't go right. I grew up in an atmosphere that was very much the same; if you spilled water on the floor, my mother acted as if you had just burned down the house on purpose. That was how I delt with life before Prozac. Even though it subdued my creativity somewhat, it is still better than being on the edge all the time, no one knowing when-including myself-I would jump off. But my roommate's issues go much deeper than that.
My older sister, who lives in Columbus, Ohio, says that Ohio pays for Mental Health much the same way as Medi-Cal, or what I am on-CMSP-pays for physical health. If my roommate lived in Ohio, she may not be subjected to so much medication and would probably receive some psythotherapy. But she was born and raised in Los Angeles, California and now resides in Suisun City, CA.
Should this be a state's issue? I do not know what is in Obamacare, but then again neither does my congressman or U.S. Senators. They passed it because, they said, they needed to. But will that law now make certain that people like my roommate get the help they need? She is anxious when there is "too much" around. Which is why I am certain they made her my roommate. (The program director has it in her head I should only have 7 outfits for work. She doesn't get that as the boss, I have to set the standard. I don't get to work in t-shirts and jeans and tennis shoes like her. I honestly think she is jealous because of my vast wardrobe.) I try to accommodate my roommate as best I can. I don't want anyone to feel uncomfortable around me or because of me. However, I am the only one in that respect, as the same program director saw fit to fill the entire blank space of our kitchen/dining room with lists of rules. They are also all over the refrigerator, which is quite funny because it discusses rotten food, when it is they (the program) that delivers liquid salad, sour milk and moldy bread. In any case, now when my roommate goes into the kitchen/dining room, her senses are assaulted with all of it. Which makes her quite anxious. While each of us in charge of our own emotions, anxiety cannot always be controlled. The program knows this, yet does what it can to antagonize her. Heaven forbid if we mention it to the program director. She will just tell us if we don't like it, we can leave. That there are plenty of people ready to take our place and that no one will miss us. How nurturing of them.
But back to my roommate. She is smart, but unable to care for herself because of her conditions. Her family can't take of her. So where does she go? Can she ever get back to where she can live on her own again? She survives on what little Social Security disability she gets and used to spend half of the month in motels until she had no money, then slept on the streets. What can we, as a society, do for people like that? I am a social liberal, but a fiscal conservative. I feel whatever people want to do, as long as they are consenting adults and no one's civil rights are being harmed, they should be able to do it in their own homes. But I don't think that hard-working people should pay for those who refuse to work. So where does that leave me?
It sucks being homeless. It must suck more to be disabled and homeless, whether that disability is physical or mental. I think I would be fine with helping out a non-governmental agency house and help people like her, when I get back on my feet.
In the meantime, I will work my way out of my situation. And who knows, I might just be on time.
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